Change. Being tired, afraid, and crabby. (Did I mention crabby?)

A few weeks ago, I have made a huge decision that has turned my life upside-down. I decided to leave my job, of six years, at Half Price Books, for another job that is higher paying and seemingly less stressful work. Without going into too much detail I will tell you that I started out at Half Price when they first opened their store in Monroeville, PA. There was nothing but concrete and drywall. I literally helped build and shape that store over the past 6 years. I had been working on my MBA when I started there, after three months was a supervisor,  and by the time I had finished my degree I had moved up to Assistant Manager.  My main reason for leaving is the overwhelming amount of student loans that I have to pay and the new job has a  higher pay with a possibility of overtime (not to mention weekends and holidays off) which is very tempting. I also feel the need to say that my opinions are my own; they do not represent half price books, my current job, or any other company/affiliation. These thoughts are my own.

 

I’m a high maintenance type of person, (I hate to admit). I worry about insignificant things and often handle change by controlling a situation and my stubborn willpower. Which is good in most cases; for example I would have never lost all of this weight, stabilized my thyroid, got off the evil blood pressure medicine, and so on so forth if I wasn’t determined to change my life. I had many roadblocks including some doctors just flat out telling me I couldn’t do it so willpower overcame the obstacles. I still have moments of weakness though, especially in situations where I can’t control or change something.

 

As I result of this new situation, I have unfortunately not lost any weight in the past few weeks (I went on vacation in July, and then since I have been back have been dealing with all of this) so for the past 3 weeks to a month have stayed where I am. I also have indulged myself more than I usually do- I had ice cream (which also explodes my body) and I also ate at McDonalds. Anyone that knows me personally knows how out of character that is for me. Indulging for me, this entire year, has been maybe eating some dark chocolate, or maybe a piece of chocolate cake. Fried foods and bread (yes bread! What the ??#$@?$#) when did I start eating bread???@@#$$ I haven’t had any bread since I stopped eating wheat yet I allowed myself a mountain pie on vacation (completely understandable) and indulged on a quarter pounder meal while agonizing over what decision to make and allowed myself an ice cream the day before.

 

So, the queen of self discipline has a kink in her armor you say! Haha! Not as perfect as you think you are! So why does our bodies crave sugar, carbs, and down right greasy goodness when we are stressed out? It’s scientific! Your adrenal glands will release cortisol when you are either tired or stressed. The cortisol release will also result in cravings for sugar or caffeine. An interesting article I found discusses this sugar/stress/inflammation connection. And as well all know, if you have constant inflammation, it prevents your body from losing weight. Here’s what happens as NOURISH Health Consulting © 2013 explains it so elegantly:

“ Sugar causes Inflammation. Food allergies cause inflammation. If it is something that is eaten frequently such as sugar, dairy and wheat, we can have consistent low to high grade inflammation going on almost all the time. The adrenals are consistently under pressure to produce cortisone to keep the inflammation under control as much as possible. The body also produces cholesterol to help compensate for the increase inflammation. Quitting the Bad Sugars and refined carbohydrates that cause much of the inflammation is a huge step in achieving optimal health. ”

“Lack of ENERGY —>Fatigue—> Need to take afternoon naps—>Cravings for sugar or caffeine to force the adrenals to give the energy that is lacking.” http://www.quadratonez.com/quitsugar1/?page_id=731

Don’t be surprised when you reach for a cookie or hamburger and coke when you are under a large amount of stress. Emotional eating during stress may happen but don’t let it become a habit; but don’t allow yourself to wallow. Don’t allow yourself to fall into despair and eating something to make yourself feel better. If you have a job that has chronic stress and you feel that it is unavoidable to grab the candy from the break room or grab that cup of coffee all I can tell you is that as soon as it becomes a lifestyle for you it will result in it affecting your health.

Having said all of that of that wonderful advice, I  have to admit to having been chronically crabby, tired, and miserable for a good month. I have been at my new job for 3 weeks and so far have been working a super early shift that I am not used to. The result is me not getting enough sleep, craving sugars, being tired, and not going to the gym as much. I am actually really disgusted with myself at this moment. My trainer wanted to see what my progress has been (take measurements) from the past two months but I held him off- I already know I haven’t lost any weight. I have spent a lot of time feeling sorry for myself, being stressed out, and “treating myself” which is very out of character for me. It seems like I am either losing 20 pounds at a time or not losing any weight at all. That has been the pattern of this year. Jan-Feb I lost 20 or so pounds give or take. March and April I lost nothing at all. May and June approximately I started “the plan” and lost another 20 plus pounds. June through now??? Well, not much. I feel stronger, and cardio wise I can run 3 miles without stopping so I am in fantastic cardio health.

I guess I will refocus on the plan and focus on getting some sleep now that my shift is changing to a more normal shift for me. I have signed myself up for an ass-kicking the next two weeks I am pretty excited about. Galaxy Fitness now offers “training for warriors”- it isn’t to be confused with crossfit because it isn’t quite as “insane” in my opinion- it does do a lot of the strength and cardio combined training that I do in my personal training sessions. If you are a galaxy member in Irwin who reads my blog, it is free for two weeks offering a variety of class times starting Monday Sept. 9^th so sign up for a free class or two! I’ll be there so come say hi if you are a member! No matter where you go to the gym if you are interested in personal training (or having a weekly ass kicking as I like to say) ask for a free session with a trainer- almost any gym/trainer will do that!

 

My friend that I spoke of in my last blog, Tabby, lost her battle with cancer this past week. My heart goes out to her family and friends, and the whole state of Texas, because they lost a state treasure. I am grateful for my brief time with her. She was one of the first friends I had who made me feel like I was worth something- and made me feel better about myself despite my large size. I feel like I owe it to her and other friends/family I have lost to cancer over the years, to live my life to the fullest and to be as healthy as I can. To do everything I never thought I could do and face my fears and insecurities. To have an amazing life. To be amazing means never saying “that’s good enough.” It means never settling for less. I wrote this in a goodbye letter to the fantastic people at half price books. But it applies to everyone- and maybe, just maybe, I need to take my own advice. Be happy and healthy my friends! Next time: All of my BEST WEIGHT LOSS TIPS in celebration of having over 1000 pageviews!